I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Everyone is drunk but me. Fantastic. Everyone is hooking up but me. Awkward.
I had a pitcher of margaritas. Now I'm in a laundry room being a 5th wheel and crying. I made myself a bed out of a pool floatie. I win.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
Randomize