none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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