I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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