he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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