I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
When exactly does a bender just become a lifestyle?
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
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