Ambien. No doubt about it.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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