You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
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Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
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I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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