Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Farmville is her only friend.
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
Come share oat with me in your robe
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
My orgasm happened in two different decades
Randomize
