I may or may not have started my period at the bar. Good thing I have dark jeans on.
As of this morning, vodka still has the other side of my BFF necklace. She treats me right.
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
