I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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