didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
