its not stalking. its research.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Have you ever woken up and said a thank you prayer to the beer gods for allowing you to wake up in the morning and still have the ability to walk and talk? Because we should.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
