Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
man, i hate rosetta stone. i wanted to impress this girl with italian last night but all i could say were things like "a blue airplane" and "he is wearing a white shirt"
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Woke up in a pile of people on the floor. His dad was already up and ask me to help him cook bacon because "7 lbs can be a mother fucker"
I either need to get adopted or have someone's baby, but I'm joining that family
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize
