Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
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