M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
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