I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
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