Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
his mom walked in while I was blowing him. he turned around in panic and accidentally punched me in the face. i have a black eye and only half the clothes i came here in. can you give me a ride?
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
