i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
God, I missed his penis.
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