I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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