What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
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