sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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