i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
It's like, "you literally have no idea who i am but i definitely slept with your brother in your bed."
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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