Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Randomize
