i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I'm retiring my vagina. Better yet I'm Farve-ing it.
Def the best call fo sho
That way it can come out of retirement anytime and play for different teams. And it can wear Wranglers.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
Randomize
