He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
Randomize
