My gyno actually laughed when I told her about his penis size.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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