Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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