I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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