fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize