i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Seriously, I would hit on barney the dinosaur right now if it meant I was going to get laid.
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
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obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
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That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
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