Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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