i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I have already put on my inside pants.
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