I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't remember shit. It was only until I saw the glaze on my forearm that I knew you drove to get donuts last night. I also spent 20$ there apparently
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
being pregnant is like rehab
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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