KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
I'm both gender and math confused
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Randomize
