She is in my trunk
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
i will never coherently bang her
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Randomize
