Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Randomize
