she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I got with him in my watermelon costume so ya you owe me $1
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
