I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Dear god my vagina.
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize