i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I'm pretty sure the rest of my evening will consist of masturbating, drinking tequila and watching children's movies.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Randomize
