I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'm currently deliberating if I'm going to be too drunk on New Years to handle wearing false eyelashes.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
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