she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, my drunken 3AM idea of safety is to send a GPS map of my location to someone 700 miles away. Seriously considering death as a viable alternative to this hangover. Death or Yuengling.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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