Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
