Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I wish i was in the wii world.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I don't care how much you're grieving a loss, masturbating off the side of a roof is not acceptable mourning behavior.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
Randomize
