I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Randomize
