sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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