4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
He asked me to describe my life outside work. I responded with "Home-wrecker.
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