Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
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