Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
