R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
That girl is like a master class on how to be an unlovable crazy person.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Randomize
