he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
