My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
too bad you live with your parents still
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
how was ur day?
this is strictly sexting don't make small talk.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Hey dude. I've got a mini fridge in my closet now so we don't have to worry about getting drunk and falling down the stairs on our way to get more beer.
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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